Crimefighting Club Queen

Dazzler #1In one of those occasional cross-overs of nelly/nerdy impulses, I just bought the entire run of Dazzler, including another 4-issue Beast/Dazzler mini-series that I hadn’t know about before. I read Dazzler for quite a while in my formative years, without it even occurring to me why I might be drawn to a disco-singing mutant who just wanted to be left alone to be a glamorous roller-skating pop star without all the hassle of being different. (Who knew?) As if that weren’t gay enough, she was constantly plagued by a blonde Asgardian bitch who was jealous of her career. It was totally the disco Dynasty of the Marvel Universe.

But since the poor dear apparently isn’t considered such a hot ticket with the typical comic-book set, the whole thing cost about as much as a couple of trades of Wolverine of something suitably macho. Once the box of the original issues arrives, expect more exciting ads to appear in the sidebars.

Stark, Industrious

While we’re on the subject of Iron Man (who I never really loved that much before, either, until Warren Ellis started to make him interesting and Adi Granov made Tony Stark look pretty hot), I stumbled across this post from Blackbeltjones, who caught Ellis’ riff on O’Reilly’s Emerging Technology conference in the first issue of the new Iron Man. Mr. Jones uses this as a launching point to talk about his own disappointment about the lack of truly new ideas at the conference — Stark’s gripe in the comic itself — but this idea is the one that grabbed me the most when I read this issue.

Since I haven’t really followed Iron Man before, I’m not sure whether or not this conundrum has shown up before. I always liked the idea, though, that the Marvel universe acknowledges that it has a few giants of scientific invention — Tony Stark, Reed Richards, Henry Pym (sorry, I know there’s a pun in that one) — and it looks like this new Iron Man series is going to grapple with how one of them actually uses that genius. Is it for the good of the military, or himself, or society? And of for society, what kind of benefit do they get? This Iron Man series starts out updating his origin wih a criticism of how Stark built his fortune on munitions with incredible destructive power. Stark insists that all those inventions had other applications, as well, and that he used the money to do ther things, but I think we’re going to see more of the gritty reality of all that. Poor, boozy Stark has always been portrayed as a troubled hero, but I don’t know how much his overall ethics have ever been thrown into the mix before. I may not know Iron man that well, but so far I really dig where this is going.

It seems, though, that it’s going to tell the story of Stark’s conflict about helping the military. I really would love to see a story somewhere that gets into what would happen if Stark or Reed Richards started tossing off inventions that led to great heaping mounds of fun, useless consumer crap. It’s been a longtime staple of the Fantastic Four for Reed to periodically rebuild the Four’s fortune with a slew of patents on ideas he’s had lying around, but we rarely see what they’re for. Clearly the Marvel universe’s Prada isn’t making clothes out of unstable molecules, so where do all these patents go, and what do they change about everyday life? How would Richards’ or Stark’s altruism handle a world full of people knocking over convenience stores to buy futuristic cellphones or sneakers based on their ideas? The military, after all, isn’t the only place where good ideas can go horribly, horribly wrong when you look at the big picture.

Robot Love

I love, love, LOVE Diesel Sweeties and heartily endorse all its related merchandise and think you should read a new installment of it every weekday. It’s always sharp, always funny, always poking fun at goofy things that are near and dear to me, and I like robots, so what’s not to love? Today’s strip is the kind that goes right to my heart — comic-book jokes that lovingly acknowledge what dorks we are! I’m getting moist.

Hipboot Chicks

I don’t have any problem with superheroes wearing outfits that are a little garish or impractical for the real world. In fact, I think I prefer them that way. They jive pretty well with the internal logic of the medium, so I don’t quibble too much about them and just enjoy them for their flair.

But then there are the ladies with the hip boots. Now, if Seven of Nine is willing to defend the use of high heels for a character then I’m willing to let that detail slide, but I don’t get the hip boots. Maybe you have to be a straight guy with some degree of appreciation for female strippers (because the basic appeal isn’t entirely lost on me), but for a crime-fighter it’s still a look that’s less “I’m gonna kick your ass” and more “I’m gonna lick your ass.’

Of course, female superheroes have long been dressed for titillation rather than intimidation, so maybe the thigh boot is just a sensible enough way to protect one’s legs from cold and abrasions when one is already dressed in a thong. I’ve never been in a fight or scaled the side of a building in a bathing suit, so I can only guess. Is it possible that Emma Frost is more sensible than we give her credit for being?

Life of Leisure

After having blood drawn this afternoon, I walked up to Grand Central to catch a train back to scenic Astoria. It was raining, so at first I assumed it was the weather and all the umbrellas that made the sidewalk on 42nd Street such a nightmare. Strolling into the station itself, I thought it might be nice to stop into the food market downstairs and pick up a nice cheese at Murray’s, but the crowds were out of freaking control! I was barely into the Great Hall when I realized that if I didn’t get out of there right away, I’d be forced to strangle someone. Huge crowds! People wandering aimlessly, cluelessly! What was up? It was a few yards closer to the subway escalator before it dawned on me: it was the afternoon before Thanksgiving, and I was in a major rail station!

It had completely slipped my mind. We’re laying low this year, so the holiday hasn’t really been on my mind. Also, after two weeks of unemployment (I like the Bohemian ring to “unemployment,” even though I’ve got piles of freelance work underway), I’ve already lost all sense of what day it is (or what time of day, usually). I had no idea I’d lost my sense of time so completely, so quickly.

Adapting to life in a home office is always a big adjustment, especially after such a long period of regular 9-to-5 drudgery. It’s a lovely adjustment, I assure you, but a big one nonetheless. The first week passes in a bit of a narcoleptic haze where every time my attention wanders I wind up taking a nap. I squeeze work in to the waking hours here and there, with a marked tendency to be most productive at night. That settles down before long (once I get back in the habit of getting enough sleep each night), but I end up sleeping late, starting to be productive in the afternoon, and plugging away into the wee hours (excepting time for social engagements here and there). It works well for me, but throws me out of sync with most of the rest of the world. In time, I’ll force a little more discipline into my schedule, but that’s still a ways off.

While I adapt, though, let me assure you that I love having no regulare job again. I may change my mind about that eventually, but for now it’s just the right thing.

Madness Non-Stop

OMG, is it Wednesday already? The 20th? This is normally the point where I would apologize for being lazy or depressed or listless or something, but for over a week now I have been a machine, folks. I’ve barely taken the time to watch Star Trek, let alone order my thoughts enough to do the blog thang.

Last Friday was my final day at the old job (except that I’m now on temporary part-time off-site status while I finish documenting everything I did while I was there), so there was the expected flurry of vital details to wrap up, and the lunches, and the errands, and the paperwork, etc. I’ve had a pile of lessons and grading for class. (Did I mention that I’m teaching a college design class this semester? I am.) Lots of WYSIWYG stuff to wrap up before tonight’s big show, and then a few freelance projects to dive into. This week I started working on a full-time freelance gig that’s had me going like gangbusters, but deleriously happy about it. Lordy! Thank goodness for Halloween-candy-induced warp speed. (Geez, and Halloween is almost here already, isn’t it? I better get started on my stressing out about a costume and eventually procrastinating and then doing nothing and feeling boring about the whole mess.)

But enough about me. Here are some things that you should be doing during the next few days:

Tax Photographs

New York City has been so built up for so long that for all the development that goes on here, it’s common to live in, work in, or visit buildings with a colorful history of use and reuse and reinvention that can stretch back for decades. It’s usually cheaper and speedier to fix up an old building than go through the hassle and expense of tearing it down and building another on the lot, so even in the years since I’ve returned here I’ve seen places almost completely transformed yet still retain some sense of their past. As Luc Sante (who went to my high school, which has its own 90-year-old building) writes in the introduction to one of my all-time favorite books, Low Life: Lures and Snares of Old New York, this is a city of ghosts where the old is always showing up among the new.

So I’m totally giddy about a new program that I read about on Gothamist yesterday: the city is selling reproductions of archival photographs of old buildings around the city. Between 1939 and 1941, the city photographed every building in New York City to help with tax appraisal, and now they making prints made from the microfilms of those records available to the public. You need to know the official block and lot number of the property when you order a photograph, but for a 5-buck extra fee they’ll even research that for you. This kicks so much ass I can hardly stand it!

I wish the house I grew up in had been around then, but there are still a few buildings I’d consider ordering:

  • 29 Whitney Ave., in Staten Island

  • 55 East 84th St.

  • 356 West 58th St.

  • 884 Targee St., in Staten Island

  • 1055 Targee St., in Staten Island

  • 82 East 4th St.

  • 87 Clermont Ave., in Brooklyn

  • 222 Varet St., in Brooklyn

A Dirty Raspberry

John Waters and Alan J. Wendl
Tracey Ullman, Selma Blair, et al.

I curated my own double-feature this weekend, checking out two movies about sexual revolution (more or less): The Raspberry Reich, the latest rump romp from Bruce La Bruce, and then A Dirty Shame, the latest farce fest from John Waters. I didn’t intend a themed afternoon, but part of the way into Raspberry Reich it was clearly going to be one, since most of the movie was a tedious rehash of stuff that John Waters has done more successfully (and certainly with better jokes) in the past. It was also a self-described “agit-porn” movie, so it wasn’t much of a leap to consider its kinship to a Waters movie about sexual deviance upsetting a quiet neighborhood in Baltimore.

The Raspberry Reich is the tale of a group of aspiring German revolutionaries aping the gimmicks of the Baader-Meinhoff Gang, and they happen to screw each other a lot and quote a lot of radical propaganda along the way. I wanted to stab pencils in my eyes most of the time. No, I take that back: it would have been pleasant enough to watch the gay sex and the punk/camp art direction if I could be spared the wooden dialogue, the pedantry, and the terrible sound quality. I always want to like Bruce LaBruce movies more than I do because I get what he’s doing (and I like subversion and gay porn), but his movies always strike me as being so blunt, with so little energy. Yeah, there’s some good camp, but it falls flat. It’s interesting to watch pornography and philosophy collide, but not when it has to rely on the comic timing or acting chops of porn stars. “Gay is not enough,” as the saying goes, and neither is punk. It still has to come together somehow, and hopefully do something a little more interesting.

John Waters has handled the clichés of revolution before (and more adroitly) in Cecil B. Demented (and even flirted with it in Pink Flamingos and Female Trouble), and even though his humor can be pretty blunt — sight gags and one-liners — he and his casts always revel in the material. Everyone always has fun and plays their parts to the hilt, and often that zeal makes for better performances than traditional acting skills might. His films are like a celebrity roast, somehow managing to spoof and celebrate at the same time. They’re famous for being shocking, but shock always fades over time, and even the earlier, cruder ones still work because they’re smart enough to hint at more than they show. They lampoon both sides of any argument (with more than a touch of sympathy for the underdog), but pretty much leave it to you to figure out who the real freaks are, who goes further over the top in defense of what they believe.

And A Dirty Shame does it again. Sorry, Bruce, it’s not so shocking to show sex in this day and age, especially if you have a jaded audience. What’s pretty outré, though, is to take a subject as highly charged as sex and make merciless fun of it. It’s a movie that’s relentlessly showing, cataloguing, and laughing at every perversion it can think of, and taking the erotic charge out of all of it. It’s not salacious in any way — it’s just having fun with how much we sexualize everything around us, regardless of whether we think all that sex is bad or good. And it’s having a lot of fun with that. The revolutionary part of all this is that it’s daring a jaded audience to take itself less seriously. Do what you want — and as much as you possibly can — but you’re not necessarily any more outrageous than the guy down the street. The revolutionary idea, of a kind that always lurks around and under all the jokes and the gags and the camp in John Waters’ universe, is that we’re all kinda freaky, and that’s good. We can all be sexy, as long as we believe we are. Your perversion isn’t bad, but your interference with someone else’s perversion is. Why shouldn’t we laugh ourselves into epiphany? It’s probably more effective than trying to badger or seduce us into one. Enjoy the ride, and let the dangerous ideas creep up on you later when you least expect it.

Tedious hostage scene
Tedious masturbation scene