Subsisting on Snacks

“Lots of snacking does not make a satisfying meal.” Every once in a while I manage to phrase a little pearl of wisdom just right. If only I were as good at paying attention to the good advice I dole out. That pithy little bit came up in the midst of an e-mail exchange in which I was talking about how disappointing it is to live someplace where sex is easy enough to find, but more substantial company is not. In the words of another pundit, “A little experimenting here and there can be fun, but mothafucka! I don’t think it’s fun no mo’.” I agree totally.

I’ll admit that I go through periods of carnal self-indulgence (usually fueled by frustration or boredom), but in the end I’m a big ol’ softie whose primary goal is not short-term adventure. Not only do random hook-ups rarely give me the boost of sexual self-confidence I’m craving, but they tend to undermine the things about myself that I really am confident about, ‘cuz those qualities just don’t matter in that particular game.

Romeo, Romeo, where the fuck art thou?

Hmmm, you’d think it was a year or so ago that the long, slow, excruciatingly painful process of me getting dumped began. Or something. Granted, that was an inevitable result, considering how ill-suited he and I were for each other. We would have realized sooner or later that we’d managed to confuse one another for the idealized, fictionalized memories we had of each other from the first time around. But damn, what a gruesome way for it to have happened.

Can you tell what kind of mood Sparky’s in today?

By Grabthar’s Hammer

Never give up, never surrenderGalaxy Quest. Brilliant. Hilarious. Who knew? This was the shocker of the weekend for me. This movie was so good, and I had totally dismissed it beforehand because the trailer looked so bad, and because… Well, because Tim Allen is so Tim Allen. (Although including the Toy story movies, this now makes three flicks of his that I really like. Eeeek!) But he holds his own alongside longtime faves like Sigourney Weaver, Alan Rickman, and Tony Shalhoub. (I never hear anyone else talk about Tony Shalhoub, but he’s always really good.) And talk about special effects! Go see it, especially if you’ve ever enjoyed a moment of star Trek in any capacity whatsoever. Adam, his cool friend Laura, and I laughed our asses off, and the film even drew applause at the end, which, for a movie being viewed by a jaded NYC audience, is like getting an Oscar.

Although after geeking out by seeing science fiction and hanging out at Forbidden Planet, we were forced to retreat to Diner for a dose of the obscenely good-looking crowd and the world’s most succulent burgers.

The bummer to the weekend was discovering that I’ve almost completely forgotten how to drive since I last got behind the wheel at Thanksgiving. I’ll be the first to admit that I react really badly when I have to do things that I don’t know how to do well, and this driving thing is throwing all those issues right into my face. Hopefully, I’ll get the hang of it a little better before my road test in two weeks. Clear the roads! At least I understand why people don’t want to drive in Manhattan, though. At one point this morning I had to dodge a speeding cab, a clueless bicycist, a jay-walking pedestrian, and a freaking pigeon as I turned onto a “quiet” side street. Fuck that! I can’t wait to drive through the desert or something.

That is all.

No More Pontificating

As of last night, I am no longer a college teacher. Technically, of course, I was an instructor of a basic computer skills class at Pratt’s school of Professional studies, but it was basically teaching college. I loved teaching, and I’m glad that I’ll be doing a lot of training as part of the new job at Miles 33, so I’ll still be able to scratch the itch.

One nice thing about teaching a class in basic Mac skills is that I get a chance to start people off on the right foot, and explain to them early on my whole philosophy about how computers are still just tools, not creative solutions. And that once you get the idea of how a system works basically, you’re armed with the ability to make educated guesses and teach yourself more, rather than just operating like some kind of trained monkey doomed to a lifetime of crappy production jobs.

Having never taken a computer class in my life, and just figured all this crap out for myself over the years, it’s nice to try and save someone else from wasting just as much time as I did being mystified by the glowing box with keyboard in front of it.

Staten Island Boy Goes Home

Poingnant exchange of the day:

Adam: Wow, it’d nice to be in love.

Me: Yeah, those were the days.

So I spent most of the weekend in Staten Island, my old stomping grounds. Friday night I went to see my folks at Aunt Lee and Uncle John’s house before Mom and Dad took off for Florida again. All my dad’s brothers were in town with my aunts, which was a nice bonus. It was very satisfying to sit around gabbing with the folks and my aunts and uncles. Believe it or not, I actually enjoy spending time with my family.

Saturday I went over to Adam‘s swanky Staten Island loft to hang out for the day. We met up with two totally fun friends of his — Eva and Sally — and drove around for a while, visitng an amazing little old-school luncheonette and a great used furniture store. Later that night the ladies came back over to Adam’s and we goofed around while salsa dancing, playing with Adam’s didgeridoo and bull-roarer, Watching The Matrix (which I manage to like more and more every time I see it) and Aliens, and playing Bust A Groove, a totally nutty Playstation game where you win by dancier funkier than your opponents.

It’s always very trippy for me to drive around Staten Island, especially if I’m having fun. I hated living there so much when I was growing up, and I went to such efforts to make sure I never had to move back once I left for college, that it’s kind of a mind-fuck for me to go back and find all these fun places to go and cool people ot hang out with there. I actually get these rushes of nostalgia about my adolescence there, suggesting that I did a better job of making the most of it than I always think I did.

Dragging My Heels

I’ve been in a bit of a fog this week. Dragging my heels, yawning at work, and sitting slack-jawed around the playhouse just watching movies (Singing in the Rain, Poison, Muppets from Space) or goofing around on the website. As soon as all my houseguests left sunday, my spirits just came crashing to the ground. I always get like that after I’ve had a good time with company around. I guess I’m still not fully recovered from being such an anti-social loser all this Fall — I still feel like it’ll be weeks between chances to see friends.

Until there’s something worth mentioning….

Hello, Millenium

Well, that’s it. since no one really cares about the nerdy truth that the new M-word actually starts next year, last night basically was it. Which is fine by me.

I actually enjoyed myself this year, believe it or not. I NEVER enjoy New Year’s Eve. Last year was a looming disaster in Boston, the year before was a massive allergy attack in Brazil. I could go on and on. Last night was awesome, until my delight was squelched by my companions for the evening. Just as I was reveling in the fact that I was enjoying myself trememdously at this totally swank DJ event in a loft in Williamsburg, I turned around and Jim told me that my friend Vincent and his two friends wanted to leave. Oh well, at least I got to hear and excellent segue of Led Zeppelin’s “Kashmir” into Rob Base before I left. We wound up back at my place with me grumpy, Jim sleepy, and the boys chatty. Oh well…

Overall, though, I must say that this holiday season went of without a hitch, once all the school nonsense was over. Christmas was lovely and warm and fuzzy, the week after was a great time to catch up and see a bunch of friends and relax around the house, I’m entertaining a few houseguests for the weekend now, and I met cool people from Thirteen who I’d never spoken to before when I went to meet Adam for lunch on my unexpected day off from work. Much better than last year’s total train wreck of a holiday season.

I was actually musing yesterday about how different life is from this point last year. I can do that a lot, actually, since I’m so fickle about apartments and jobs. But last year to this was quite a leap. I’m a little lonely now, but otherwise things are OK, and at least I’ve learned from one of the biggest mistakes I ever made.

Hatin’ Christmas

Christmas-Eve Eve, and I still hate Christmas. Basically, I like Thanksgiving a lot better than Christmas. I love spending time with my family, and I love getting away for a day or two, but Thanksgiving doesn’t get in the way of my day-to-day craziness the way Christmas does. Christmas is the source of so much more obligation that it takes away all the fun of showering people with love. Bah humbug. But love to all.

Special shout-outs to people who sent me really sweet Christmas cards or messages. I’m sorry that my phone phobia has spread to e-mail and cards lately, and I haven’t responded properly. Big hugs to all you guys.

I did have a great Christmas party at work last week, though. Perhaps the first official Christmas party for work I’ve ever attended that I actually liked. There are many benefits to working at a small, friendly company where you like everyone. One of them is not the oft-repeated question about whether or not I have someone to bring to the Christmas party. Aside from the general sting of being reminded that I don’t have anyone to bring, it makes me glad that I haven’t settled down in Connecticut like everyone else there, however.

But I did bring my friend Adam to see the Candy Butchers at Brownie’s the other night. In case you know who the Candy Butchers are, rest assured that it was a great, fun show. If you don’t know, you should learn to love them like I do.

Kickin’ Ass and Droppin’ Out

We kicked ass on Friday. Fragile was a huge success at our presentation to the Pratt faculty. We dressed down for the presentation to make it look like we were in the midst of moving (that was the point of the book, after all), and I threw in a little editorial commentary by wearing a t-shirt that read “I HATE DOING THIS SHIT.” I don’t know how many of the faculty realized how much editorializing I was actually doing, but I suspect hat the chairman of the department got the point.

So I end my second illustrious attempt at graduate school with a similar record as the first — A solid “A” to match every incomplete. Except I’m letting those incompletes turn into failures at Pratt, because I don’t think I’ll be needing a transcript again. And if I do, I’m willing to explain why I aced upper-level courses and failed basic requirements.

I ran into Mel Byars, the professor for my “History of Communication Design” course, who was wondering why I stopped going to class after Thanksgiving, missing the second paper and the final class presentation. I explained my desire to devote what little time I had to my studio class, and he told me that my first paper (on Piet Zwart) was the best in the class, and that he wanted me to submit it to the Pratt library, which inexplicably had no reference material on Zwart. so he thanked me for being a pleasure in class, and urged me to send the paper in to the Pratt librarian. Pretty good for a failure, I guess.

The only real disappointment of the day was that I realized that this one really handsome guy I’d been seeing around the Puck Building was one of the CommD faculty, and I never got to talk to him, even though I think he’s been checking me out. Maybe he was just smiling at the t-shirt, though. Oh well, another day, another lost opportunity.

What I Learned in School

My brain hurts too much to think properly right now. If my last semester of grad school has taught me anything, I have learned:

  • I am much too old and weary to pull all-nighters. Last night I went to bed after 36 straight hours of school work, regular work, wandering around in the rain to find a Kinko’s whose Fiery printer was working, and being generally miserable.
  • Group projects can really blow chunks. A corollary to this: When you spot a bad apple at the beginning of the semester, you know he won’t rally at the end.
  • Group projects can also help you bond really well with people you like. Many thanks to my fellow survivor’s of Fragile.
  • Pratt really needs to get its shit together.

In other news, I’m loving work despite the sleep deprivation. God only knows if I’ll be able to get to work tomorrow, seeing as there’s a threat of a city-wide transit strike. I’ll probably have to ride my bike to Grand Central, and I bet the streets are gonna look like Beijing.

If the MTA goes on strike, I think we’ll see a lot of people beating the crap out of transit workers.

P.S.: I hate Christmas.