So while I was sleeping off the evening’s thrill ride, my old pal Mark had another outbreak of Scaroliosis (his unique condition that makes him so prone to occasionally comic but often catastrophic back luck).
You see, Mark had a long day and strolled outside his front door a little after midnight to give Buster, his sweet and playful Yellow Lab, a quick walk before bedtime. He and Buster were walking a few doors down on his quiet little street in Fort Greene when the cops pulled up and asked where Buster’s leash might be. Mark explained that Buster was just out to find a nearby tree before heading back inside, but the cops informed him that this infraction was a “quality of life crime” and not the sort of thing they could overlook. Since he had no I.D. on him, they asked him to run inside and get something to show. He brought Buster and came back down with his license, and was greeted with handcuffs and a ride down to the station.
The officers who later came by to bring him to a jail for the night were appalled at what had happened — getting arrested for walking a mushy blonde dog of the leash in the middle of the night — and apologized profusely as they brought him to his evening’s accomodations in a 10″ x 12″ cell shared by 10 other guys (at least one of whom had also been brought in for walking his dog without a leash).
So who thinks things are finally back to normal here in the city? Who thinks the terror warnings are no longer quite enough to keep the annoying police-state happenings at bay any more? And who thinks Bloomberg is going to have the same smarmy savvy that Giuliani did to keep things from really blowing up about it once and for all?
so much for heroes
That sounds like a great story for the Daily News or the National Networks!! Hope Mark survived and hopefully sue their butts off!
as much as i’m annoyed by people who walk their dogs without a leash…u gotta be kiddin me. this is too stupid.
I hope our mayor down here in Satellite Beach doesn’t hear about that, we’ll have a new law on the books. Did you know it’s actually illegal to have fun here? NO ONE MOVE TO FLORIDA, EVER.
Yes. It is all true. I am a criminal, a repeat offender, in fact. FYI: One of the officers told me that Bloomberg is looking to set up a special court for repeat offenders of “quality of life crimes” such as myself, in order to help make up this city’s growing budget deficit. The officer told me that three strikes will get you a year in jail and up to $5000 in fines. Wonder what that means to me since my next strike will be number four. . .
Lady Liberty, you’re a goddamn slut.