Day: May 30, 2002

Google Me, Baby

I make it a point not to look at my site logs, since the last thing I need is something else to obsess about. In a frantic search for somethign to post that wasn’t all about me and how grumpy I am, though, I finally caved in and scanned for Google search results. Why now? After all, everyone else always does it when they need a quick bit of content:

Sparky sex
cheap flattery
morph changes to rogue
secret crushes
nude nerds
gut hangs over pants
secret paparazzi pictures
I didn’t win a bloggie
jessie model gay
I failed my road test
one balled wonder
undersea sex
funny pictures jeans make my ass look big
don’t be gay Sparky
swinging couple williamsburg horny
ultra love jeans
gay nerds
frank gehry bad atrocious
evil dave tattoo
hipster hair
Home Depot homos
crazy sex in nutley

And that barely scratches the surface. I didn’t even want to get into the depths of depravity that people thought they might find here. I hope everyone found what they were looking for!

The Bottled-Up City of Candor

It was a big decision for me to be candid here on the site about what’s been happening to me lately. But considering that a lot of my struggles are about being afraid to admit to weakness or vulnerability, I thought it would be a healthy step to let it all hang loose for once and see how things go. Also, my thoughts have been so addled lately that it’s been good for me to record them here during moments of clarity, or at least during the moments when I had the energy to try sorting them out. For friends and family and such, it’s proven to be a useful way to take a barometer reading of how I’m doing. For other people who read but don’t actually know me, I guess it just makes for a curious roller-coaster ride of depression and angst. Whee! Come watch Sparky get his crazy on!

I haven’t really found it detrimental to just own up to my problems here, however. I feel a little exposed, true, but all the venting and the navel-gazing has been pretty cathartic. That counts for something, right?