{"id":779,"date":"2002-06-16T11:54:00","date_gmt":"2002-06-16T11:54:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/ultrasparky.org\/blog\/?p=779"},"modified":"2024-12-03T19:24:56","modified_gmt":"2024-12-04T03:24:56","slug":"a_dilemma_of_my","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/ultrasparky.org\/blog\/2002\/06\/16\/a_dilemma_of_my\/","title":{"rendered":"A Dilemma of My Own"},"content":{"rendered":"

This weekend was my turn<\/strong> to go out on a date with a friend of a friend. As with you, it was a guy I\u2019d met a few times before but never really got to know, and who I liked a lot once we got to know each other a little bit. Fun, smart, and good-looking, but I was also feeling a little bit of frustration about getting back into the same old routine of meeting a nice guy and crossing my fingers hoping that if he was even interested in me that he\u2019d also share any of my leather fetish. Nice, attractive guys who really capture my interest are rare enough. Ones that like me back narrow the pack down a little further. The additional factor of finding someone who actually responds to leather like I do is usually the one I\u2019ve had to compromise on. Lately, though, as I\u2019ve thought more and more about wanting to stop shoving parts of who I am away into storage, I get more frustrated about having to give up this thing that\u2019s such a potent part of my sexual make-up.<\/p>\n

You and I have been in the same spot for a while, John: it\u2019s really important to us to find guys who appeal to us both sexually and mentally. We’ve always gone the traditional route: hoping to meet nice guys through regular channels, and then just secretly hoping they share some of our more unconventional interests. It’s not a bad approach, but it hasn’t been very successful.<\/p>\n

As much as I know I like to play around with different guys who share only a small part of the things that make up who I am, one of the lessons I\u2019ve learned in my years of whoring around and getting to know myself better sexually and emotionally is that at heart I\u2019m the marrying kind. Not a prude, and not fixated on the idea of monogamy just for the sake of it. I just know I like to focus the bulk of my attention on one guy who excites me on many levels.<\/p>\n

I\u2019ve always been so self-conscious about owning up to how much the leather thing actually means to me, and the result has been that I\u2019ve always treated it like a dirty secret. I\u2019m trying to approach it differently now: this time I don’t want to just cruise for guys into leather who just want to fuck and run. I\u2019m sure I can continue to have plenty of fun and discovery along the way with those guys, but now I may as well just admit that what I want is to get really involved with someone who\u2019s into leather like I am, who appreciates ideas and life like I do. Maybe I\u2019ve just been looking for the total package \u2014 that best friend plus<\/i> \u2014 from the wrong angle.<\/p>\n

I\u2019ve been underestimating the leathermen and hoping there\u2019d be another nice guy with a fetish of his own. Now, I think it\u2019s time to look at the leathermen as a pool of candidates who\u2019d be just as likely to have a life beyond their fetish that would rock my world. Yes, me, I\u2019m open to wooing.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

This weekend was my turn to go out on a date with a friend of a friend. As with you, it was a guy I\u2019d met a few times before but never really got to know, and who I liked a lot once we got to know each other a little bit. Fun, smart, and … Continue reading “A Dilemma of My Own”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[9,5],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-779","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-ultragay","category-ultrapersonal"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/ultrasparky.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/779","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/ultrasparky.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/ultrasparky.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ultrasparky.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ultrasparky.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=779"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/ultrasparky.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/779\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":77533,"href":"https:\/\/ultrasparky.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/779\/revisions\/77533"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/ultrasparky.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=779"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ultrasparky.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=779"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ultrasparky.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=779"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}