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All Glamour, All the Time

It's hard to maintain my rep as a Grade-A sexy motherfucker without the photographic evidence to back it up, so let's just see what I got myself up to this past weekend...


Gotcha! Yes, my emergency root canal has spawned on a drawn-out saga of frequent visits to the NYU Dental School, where I’m having a number of lingering issues resolved. Because that stuff costs some scratch (of which I don't have quite enough, which is what got me in this position in the first place), I agreed to spend Saturday as a guinea pig for my teen dentist's licensing exam. Basically, that means it was a regular drill-n-fill, but with long breaks where I would sit around with my mouth clamped open and have strangers come by and check out the progress being made by the teen dentist and his frat-boy assistant. Occasionally, I even got to walk around the hallways like some purple-bedecked monster of some sort so people in another room could check out my teeth. Ah, the things we do for science.

Honestly, I did it for the free filling and the additional discounts, and also because my dentist — who I fondly think of as Doogie Howser, DDS — is a nice kid who needed a favor just as much as I needed a free filling.

He's not actually a teenager (he probably passed out of his teens at least a couple of years ago), but it is a bit disconcerting to hit that age where you're likely to be putting your health and well-being into the hands of people much younger than you. Luckily, it's a lot easier to handle when you automatically get second and third opinions from the faculty advisors every step of the way, even if it takes a little longer. Also, it's not entirely unpleasant to have cute straight boys stick tools in your mouth and blush when you joke around with them.

Comments (8)

1) Aaron: So, you're doing lesbian porn now, dental damn and all? SAFE=HOT rawr. (Feb 28, 2006 12:55 PM)

2) david z.: I hope they got some points taken off for the unsanitary camera-handling. (Mar 1, 2006 3:38 AM)

3) Rich: Note to self. Trim nose hairs before next dental appointment. (Mar 5, 2006 10:18 PM)

4) Ryan: Have you seen Cremaster 3? Hopefully not. I had a flashback, and it was bad. (Mar 6, 2006 7:14 PM)

5) Ellen: Too funny! Poor boy. Going through similar horrors w/my mouth but at least have decent dental insurance for a change! xox Ellen (Mar 7, 2006 10:16 PM)

6) Paul: The nose hairs really make the picture :) (Mar 15, 2006 9:51 PM)

7) sam: Wow, you really can get that mouth open wide (Mar 29, 2006 12:37 PM)

8) timothy: OMG! I was a guinea pig at the Harvard Dental School in Boston. I had some nice work done for free! and the Orthodontic Wannabe even paid my cab fare for his finals. He wasn't the top of his class, I spent 5 1/2 hours in the dental dam on one appointment, but he did have a nice chairside manner. I will say though, that after meeting the instructors at HDS I won't go to anyone but a Harvard Dentist! (Mar 31, 2006 11:35 AM)

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